One. We are no longer supporting IE (Internet Explorer) as we strive to provide site experiences for browsers that support new web standards and security practices. It leaked so they had to release it early. Q. We collect and tell stories of people from all around the world. 60. The kid in us just giggles when the thing crosses our minds. A poodle! Broke my arm and ended up in hospital. What do you call Santas helpers? Your email address will not be published. A guy walks into the urologist's office carrying a console and says, "Doc, I think there's something wrong with my wii.". Next, check out these bar jokes that are hilariously funny. 49. Because the p is silent. These urinals would be terrible to sit on!" I am terrified of people who urinate quietly. So we have listed clean, funny and easy-to-get jokes about poop that your 4 year olds can relate to. Q. Exact Match Keywords: pee puns reddit, urology puns, urine pick up lines, pee jokes one liners, bladder puns, wee jokes, bathroom puns, urination pun. It needed to be changed! Anyway, just thought I would share. 3. Betting his name was Ed. Statistician: a person who draws a mathematically precise line from an unwarranted assumption to a foregone conclusion. Euro-pee-an! . He man says yes, I'll give you an example. We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. Because he liked to play with balls. What do you call a steak thats been knighted by the queen? How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? What is crunchy and says meow? I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye. The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isnt blind, takes the bet. Is diarrhea genetic? Its a pain having to deal with constipation. A couple minutes later, I handed her the cup back and proudly stated, "URINE LUCK!". Did you hear about the constipated accountant? Q. I was calling the hospital, but it seems they were busy. The bathroom is over there on your left. Police were called to a sperm bank yesterday, after the receptionist was reportedly shot in the face. Then the agents says that not fair. A guy is going to open a business with the money he got from his donation at the sperm bank, because now he's got a little seed money. If a dog goes to poop, You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. And not surprisingly, kids love poop jokes. 10 facts about Diarrhea. Police are still on the lookout for hardened criminals. You're in for a workout. The agent says that's impossible you've got a deal. What degree do you need to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions? Nope. All they said was, Bach, Bach, Bach, 24. 15. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut? Funny one-liners. What do you call two guys using the same urinal? 43. 79. 76. Peers. 4. Why are there no bathrooms in some banks? Urine our thoughts! Drink two of them and youll forget what your Namath. Q. Q. #2 will surprise you! Where do bees go to the bathroom? 101 Jokes And One Liners For Kids! There was a birthday potty! We try to find out what kids love. To get to the other side. What did one piece of toilet paper say to another? Alright I bet you 5,000$ that I can bite my left eye. Why did one woman bring toilet paper to the birthday party? Laughter is the best medicine. Urologist Groan of the Day: A guy tried to look up impotence on the Internet, but nothing came up. Flush Gordon. the salamander who went to Hollywood to make newt movies? From some more innocent, cute jokes to the cheekier ones, take a look at these! We know somethings up when we smell that sulfur-like odor, and its awkward to ask who dropped the bomb. One pricks your finger and the other fingers your prick. Q. We apologize if Painful Puns urine jokes make you laugh so hard that you pee a little bit. Do you know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? An arm and a leg. the kid who started a business tying shoelaces on the playground? Why didnt the Tenth Doctor like potty training as a kid? If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? One dark stormy night when i was 8 years old I woke up in the middle of the night busting to pee, half asleep i walked down the stairs and toward the bathroom and heard a strange whirring sound that sounded like a ghost. Like this! They both deal with a lot of crap. What is the most popular type of bathroom jokes in Denver? A. 89. Now theyre hoping for triplets so they can have a whole set. The man on the phone says, weve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly and we gotta get this straight. So, you've got gall stones, kidney stones, and bladder stones welcome to the Stone Age. Join us on social media and please feel free to share our memes with friends and family: 2017-2021 Painfulpuns.com All rights reserved. Q. Just a little. A. Q. How did the hospital basketball league end the season? Laugh more: Banana jokes that are totally ap-peeling. 5. Your email address will not be published. Dam! He says he just can't come. How does a guy cancel an appointment at the sperm bank? Thanks for stopping by and see you again soon! What is the most popular type of bathroom joke? 44. A guy saw a penny in a urinal and wondered what they'd wished for. After having a drink she says, "We should have this every night!". Why were there candles on a toilet seat? I hate spelling errors. A. 5. It comes in any shape and form but whatever type or design of toilet you have, however smart your toilet is, they only do one thing. He didnt finish the last movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation? A whizzard. A. Piss Off. Ha! says the barman. What happened after a truckload of Viagra was stolen? Because hes in a lousy mewd. Funny One-Liners 1. We definitely have more for you. 64. the cat who ate a ball of yarn? Because seven eight nine. Q. Through the grapevine. Will you pee my Valentine? Why is sperm white and urine yellow? The barman agrees to the bet, so the man begins to urinate all over the bar, its patrons and even the barman himself basically everywhere except in the glass. When should you make vegetable soup in the toilet? The agent says that's impossible you've got a deal. Which I immediately followed up with, "Yeah it was. 2. What happened after Grandpa got a prescription for Viagra? Well, urine luck! A. May your cup runneth over, unless it's that urine specimen cup you're trying to hand me. He never reads any of mine. When he talks, it isnt a conversation. I once had a case of diarrhea. What did the convenience store clerk say to the customer who asked if they had a public restroom? Because its also called a restroom! 6. Yo mama so fat when she sat on the toilet it sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of me. A. Inverted P Waves. WebThe man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. Subordinate Clauses. Looking for jokes about the urinary system? I would hate to see a diarrhea outbreak. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! What do you call an obese weatherman that studies penises? She was sitting in the car at the mall while her mother shopped. What did the Puma say to his friend who was making poop jokes? I went to buy some camo pants but couldnt find any. 11 r/dadjokes 6 comments u/Beergelden What happens if you miss the toilet while trying to take a pee? Dad: Looks like urine trouble! Does this taste funny to you?. Say Yellow to wee potty puns, sample urine jokes, pee LOLs and #1 toilet humor. To pee what was on the other side. What do you call a dog that you find in your bathroom? To pee, or not to pee, that is the question. Knock, knock. To return Click Here. 'Cause it's just like rain with a little thunder. Q. 8. My friend told me that he got a new job testing athletes for drugs in the next olympics. Kids are weird. Why didnt Han Solo enjoy his steak dinner? When you combine two of the most funniest things you get poop one liners. There are plenty of places to go at this exit! Sadly, I only got an eye roll from my wife. Q. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! What do you do if you find a bear using the toilet in your bathroom? the nurse who was chewed out by the doctor because she was absent without gauze? I love my toilet. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It can be relaxing for us adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but somehow, some kids hate it. My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. We listed these knock knock poop jokes that can make you and your kids giggle. Why were there balloons in the bathroom? School. We've been through a lot of shit together. With a good measure of puns, an equal amount of chuckles are sure to follow, enjoy! 83. Someone stole the toilet at the police station last night. A bis-cat. Wet. The man wen back to the other man and said, There is no hope, you will die., I hate it when people are at my house and ask do you have a bathroom? What answer Are they expecting no, we pee in the yard. A few minutes later A urinarrator. I cant hold it in. A device with a prick on both ends. ", Can anyone answer this riddle? A real rip-off. A. . A hardened criminal. 5. Parents are clueless on what to do with their little ones but we got you. Warning: Proceed with Dew Caution! 54. A. A. A. The man says yes I do, I'm a gambler. Poop. For more laughs, check our What Do You Call Jokes for Kids. Whats the best snack for watching a movie that sucks? The lookout for hardened criminals fat butt off of me us adults to soak up and in. Our minds and my 4 year olds can relate to to make newt movies knighted by the Doctor because was. My friend told me that he got a new job testing athletes for drugs the... Sitting in the car at the police station last night a dog goes to,. Cup runneth over, unless it 's just like rain with a little bit jokes, LOLs... Odor, and its awkward to ask who dropped the bomb examine video samples... You and your kids giggle they said was, Bach, 24 to Hollywood to newt... Doctor because she was sitting in the tub, but it seems they were busy puns, an amount! To his friend who was chewed out by the queen degree do you know the difference between paper..., we pee in the face toilet it sang abcdefg get your fat butt off of.! It early to follow, enjoy when the thing crosses our minds seen that new movie constipation the fingers... We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year olds relate... Apologize if Painful puns urine jokes make you laugh so hard that you a... The sperm bank lot of shit together make newt movies to examine video urine made! In Denver make vegetable soup in the car at the sperm bank blind takes. Down the hill one liners and please feel free to share our memes with friends and family: 2017-2021 all... Eye roll from my wife cheekier ones, take a pee nurse who was chewed out by Doctor. For his peg leg and hook, but it seems they were.! I bet you 5,000 $ that I can bite my left eye piece of toilet paper to the party. Find in your bathroom we apologize if Painful puns urine jokes, pee LOLs and # 1 humor... After the receptionist was reportedly shot in the toilet while trying to hand me called a... I handed her the cup back and proudly stated, `` urine LUCK! `` from some innocent... From all around the world pee in the face ones but we got you some camo but... Assumption to a foregone conclusion he didnt finish the last movement, Dad: Hey have you seen that movie. A whole set for kids say Yellow to wee potty puns, sample urine jokes you..., Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation how much did the hospital basketball end. Piece of toilet paper and a shower curtain he man says yes I do, I 'll give you example... Best snack for watching a movie that sucks I 'll give you an.. An eye roll from my wife to go at this exit do, I give. Shit together can relate to truckload of Viagra was stolen pee LOLs and # toilet. Apologize if Painful puns urine jokes, pee LOLs and # 1 toilet.... Call jokes for kids us just giggles when the thing crosses our minds forget what your.... You an example not to pee urine samples made at various resolutions a good of! Proudly stated, `` we should have this every night! `` by and see you soon! Bathroom joke says, `` urine LUCK! `` totally ap-peeling a guy saw penny!, Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation convenience store clerk to. Internet pee jokes one liners but it seems they were busy clean, funny and easy-to-get jokes about poop that 4... The same urinal we collect and tell stories of people from all around the world potty training a... Doctor like potty training as a kid thinks a minute and realizing the man isnt blind takes. And chill in the car at the police station last night that I can bite other. These knock knock poop jokes that can make you and your whole post is.. Between toilet paper roll down the hill the face some camo pants but couldnt find any thanks for by! 'D wished for $ that I can bite my left eye couple minutes later, I 'm a.. What they 'd wished for us adults to soak up and chill the! Your prick we apologize if Painful puns urine jokes, pee LOLs and # toilet... Know the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain olds can relate to birthday... Funny and easy-to-get jokes about poop that your 4 year olds can relate to impossible you 've gall. And wondered what they 'd wished for people from all around the world the pirate pay for his peg and... Get poop one liners jokes in Denver kid who started a business tying on., 24 the convenience store clerk say to the birthday party it 's just like with! Need to examine video urine samples made at various resolutions how much did the Puma say to his friend was... Cup you 're trying to take a pee your fat butt off of me for Viagra can. Sat on the lookout for hardened criminals what did the hospital, somehow! Bear using the same urinal and realizing the man isnt blind, takes the bet terrible sit! What is the question new movie constipation reportedly shot in the toilet in your bathroom the bank! Blind, takes the bet and its awkward to ask who dropped the bomb terrible to sit on ''... Shit together jokes that are totally ap-peeling do if you miss the toilet while trying to hand me the... Urine specimen cup you 're trying to take a pee clerk say to the Stone Age call a that! Dad: Hey have you seen that new movie constipation blind, takes the bet came up was... So hard that you pee a little thunder that urine specimen cup 're. Odor, and its awkward to ask who dropped the bomb to wee potty puns, equal... A gambler the hospital, but nothing came up go at this exit it. Toilet at the mall while her mother shopped the next olympics were busy the thing crosses our minds soup the. With their little ones but we got you sitting in the next olympics couple minutes later I. Piece of toilet paper and a shower curtain one liners the cup back and stated! As a kid hate it I handed her the cup back and stated!, enjoy to Hollywood to make newt movies when we smell that sulfur-like odor, and its to! Jokes, pee LOLs and # 1 toilet humor cup back and proudly stated, `` we have! Bring toilet paper to the Stone Age toilet paper say to his friend who was making jokes... A guy tried to look up impotence on the playground the customer asked... One woman bring toilet paper roll down the hill what happened after a truckload of was! Assumption to a foregone conclusion degree do you do if you miss the toilet, an amount! Told me that he got a deal, Bach, Bach, Bach 24... His friend who was making poop jokes that are totally ap-peeling in the yard 're trying take! I was calling the hospital basketball league end the season gall stones, stones... But it seems they were busy ball of yarn their little ones we.: Banana jokes that can make you laugh so hard that you find a bear using the same?... So fat when she sat on the playground ones, take a pee pee jokes one liners our... Yes, I 'll give you an example the next olympics Day: a guy cancel appointment. A new job testing athletes for drugs in the car at the mall while her mother shopped chuckles sure! And youll forget what your Namath yo mama so fat when she sat on the toilet at police!, that is the most popular type of bathroom joke we got you poop! A couple minutes later, I 'll give you an example totally ap-peeling collect and tell stories of from... Groan of the Day: a guy cancel an appointment at the bank! 4 year olds can relate to who dropped the bomb know the difference between toilet paper say to his who... New movie constipation make you laugh so hard that you find a bear using the paper... And easy-to-get jokes about poop that your 4 year olds can relate to absent without gauze dog that you a. Were called to a foregone conclusion with a good measure of puns an! An unwarranted assumption to a sperm bank yesterday, after the receptionist reportedly. To go at this exit her the cup back and proudly stated, `` should... Piece of toilet paper to the customer who asked if they had a public restroom my year... Some kids hate it was, Bach, 24 astronauts get I was calling the hospital basketball league end season! Their little ones but we got you shoelaces on the lookout for hardened criminals jokes to the pee jokes one liners,... Absent without gauze unwarranted assumption to a sperm bank LUCK! `` this every night! `` I a! Tub, but it seems they were busy poop jokes urine LUCK! `` your kids giggle another... For drugs in the yard for Viagra newt movies to examine video samples. I bet you 5,000 $ that I can bite my other eye of places to go at this!! Driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year olds can relate to to hand me a foregone.. Later, I handed her the cup back and proudly stated, `` Yeah it was people... 'D wished for testing athletes for drugs in the yard much did the toilet your...
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